Letting Go of the Past - Rachel Devine
The past is just an illusion that holds a ton of memories and feelings. However, make no mistake about it, the past is over and cannot be changed. We can hold onto the fears that certain past experiences have embedded in our mind, but the reality is, it cannot hurt us anymore. The past is just a fleeting thought that does crop up when we want to move forward in life either with perhaps a family matter, a relationship, or a new job, or any number of situations that propel us in life. Leading your life with past emotional baggage can only cause fear, anxiety and one to feel stifled. It zaps one of happiness.
Letting go of the past is the key to moving forward on your journey through life, especially resentments and any other unforgiveness. Let’s take a look at ways to let go of the past.
Here are some concrete ways to let go of past emotional baggage:
Practice mindfulness meditation to stay present and avoid dwelling on the past.
Write a letter expressing your feelings, then ceremonially burn or destroy it.
Talk to a therapist or life coach to process unresolved emotions.
Use the "empty chair" technique: speak to an imaginary person from your past.
Engage in physical activities like exercise or dance to release pent-up emotions.
Practice forgiveness exercises, both for others and yourself.
Create a "letting go" ritual, like releasing balloons or floating paper boats.
Use cognitive restructuring to challenge and reframe negative thought patterns.
Practice gratitude daily to shift focus from past hurts to present blessings.
Volunteer or help others gain perspective and create new, positive memories.
The Power of writing a letter
I want to elaborate on writing a letter as a way of letting go. I have done this several times in my life, and I have to say that it is powerful beyond comprehension. Whoever you need to let go of, write in a letter thanking the person for teaching you any life lessons you may have learned. For instance, if you have a disgruntled boss that has given you a hard time, you can write a letter telling the boss that you are grateful for learning the lesson that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness and further elaborate on other aspects of the relationship. Or if you had a breakup with a romantic partner, you can list all the lessons from the experience of the relationship. When you are done writing, you can simply say at the end, “I forgive you, and I release you to God for the good of all.” Then you can read it out loud and burn the letter either in the sink or in your backyard, or just destroy it in a sink with water or tear it up.
Letting go of past hurts and fears in this manner is a way to let God’s vast universe know that you learned these lessons and don’t want to have to repeat them again with someone else. It will get released from your subconscious mind so it doesn’t have power and control over your thoughts. It is also a way to release you from the pain of the past.
Practice gratitude in the moment
When you practice gratitude on a regular basis, you are staying in the moment. Being grateful is a gift, but so is being in the present moment. When you are in the moment, there is no room for ruminating about the past or projecting a dire future. The moment is when you can live your life to the fullest and be part of the living. When we start to look at the past or the future, we have lost touch with reality, because the only reality we have is breathing in this very moment of our lives. Past regrets, angst and unforgiveness is emotional baggage that weighs us down. Letting go of these past wounds is liberating.
Talking it out
Of course, speaking about our past is therapeutic because it releases us from the burden of past wounds. There is a saying, “We are only as sick as our secrets.” Getting a therapist or life coach is crucial to working out issues that get stuck in our minds. Speaking about the past is a good way to come to terms with what happened and release it. Also, a good therapist or life coach will help you work through any issues that linger in the present moment.
Some statistics on the power of letting go:
While exact statistics can vary, research supports the benefits of letting go, and I found these statistics.
A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that people who practice forgiveness have 34% lower levels of stress hormones.
Research from Stanford University showed that individuals who let go of grudges were 43% more likely to report higher levels of happiness.
A study in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine found that people who practiced emotional release techniques reported a 23% reduction in physical pain symptoms.
According to a survey by the American Psychological Association, 62% of Americans believe that letting go of negative experiences from their past would significantly improve their mental health.
These findings suggest that letting go can lead to improved mental and physical health, increased happiness, and better overall life satisfaction. By releasing past baggage, individuals can free up mental and emotional resources to focus on personal growth, build stronger relationships, and pursue their goals more effectively.
Take a moment to contemplate what you may need to let go of, and then pick one or two of the above suggestions and release the past so you can have a brighter present-day experience. And remember, forgiveness is an act of self-love. It frees you from the burden of resentments that seep into our body and create stress related illness. Liberate yourself from the chains of another person having all that power over you.
The research I did for this book taught me so much and I share all of that with you.