Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff - Choose Peace over Conflict - Rachel Devine
Life is too short to become stressed over every little thing other people do that we don't like. Remember, you can't control anyone but yourself. When someone irritates you, remember that you have the choice of how to respond. Typically, we respond with a reactive one. What if we took a moment to just breathe and decided that we didn't really want to give this person the power to ruin our day?
Let's look at some techniques to choose peace over conflict and not sweat the small stuff.
Life is too short to become stressed over every little thing other people do that we don't like. Remember, you can't control anyone but yourself. When someone irritates you, remember that you have the choice of how to respond. Typically, we respond with a reactive angry attitude, because the other person hit a nerve. Or perhaps the other person triggered us, which can be emotionally overwhelming. What if we took a moment to just breathe and decided that we didn't really want to give this person the power to ruin our day? Also, at times, it may not be the other person. It may be how you react to whatever happened.
Let's look at some techniques to choose peace over conflict.
Count to Ten
When you encounter someone you know is hard to deal with and they go into a rant that sets you off, stop and count to ten, leave the room or take some deep breaths. Taking a few seconds to compose yourself will help you have more control and, in turn, be able to have more control over your emotions and how you respond. Try not to react, rather, take a time-out and respond with a level head. This is key to keeping your cool during conflict. Abraham Lincoln said, “When angry count to 10, when very angry count to 100.”
Take your power back
When we allow others to ruin our day because they are rude to us, we have handed over our power to the other person. Picture it this way. The other person has a remote control and presses a button that says, “ruin their day,” or a button that says, “make them angry” or “make them stressed.” Don't allow others to push your buttons. Take the remote control back, and in turn, you will take back your power. Remember, you always have the choice of how you will respond to others' rudeness. They are not ruining your day; you are choosing to let them ruin your day.
Detach with love
Detachment is the key to serenity. You might live with someone who is totally obnoxious and difficult to live with. The key is to detach from the person with love. In other words, observe what is happening from an outsider's standpoint rather than get emotionally involved in the encounter. Just act as an observer of what is happening and then react from that state of mind. You will be able to be more rational in walking away from the conflict. Remember, if you leave the room, the person has no one to fight with. This will give you peace. Don't focus on the person who is hard to live with; rather, focus on your own life and detach with love. It’s important to recognize ways to overcome the obstacles that come your way in order to be happy with your life. One major way is to detach with love and discover how peaceful life can really be.
Peace
Daily peaceful techniques
Doing a daily meditation will help you get more centered in a peaceful state of mind. You can do a number of different meditations, from being in your happy place to listening to a peaceful meditation on YouTube. To get to your happy place, close your eyes and simply meditate on a place that makes you very happy and sit in that place in your mind. Perhaps you want to get quiet in a room alone, meditate with peaceful music, and add some scented candles to the mix. Taking a nice, relaxing bath will also help you feel more at peace.
Forgiveness is an act of self-love
Forgiveness is the key to getting rid of resentment and bitterness. Our resentments usually cause an irrational response to someone pushing our buttons. Forgiveness is an act of self-love. When you forgive the other person, you are releasing the venom that is going through your veins in the form of bitterness. Releasing the bitterness will release you from the stress that causes health issues. Also, ask yourself: Will this conflict matter tomorrow, a month or a year from now, or when you are on your deathbed? Sometimes what is important in the heat of the moment will not be important tomorrow. A good slogan many use is "How important is it?" In the scheme of everyday life, how important is this showdown of conflict? This is a great slogan to ponder.
People take simple conflicts to the point of cutting people out of their lives. Our pride usually gets in the way of reaching out to the other person for a mutual resolution. Remember, it is the strong person who can put aside their pride and reach out to the other person to communicate with them to resolve conflicts. Again, the question arises: how will you feel in the future about this same situation? Another good question is, how would you advise a friend who has the same conflict? Sometimes what seems so magnified now will look trivial in the future.
In conclusion, with a little awareness, you can become peaceful again if you take your power back, detach with love, and forgive the person you are in conflict with. You can forgive them without speaking to them. Remember, the person you are in conflict with is your greatest teacher. Those who can push our buttons have much to teach us. You might one day look back on your life and realize that the person who pushed your buttons taught you more than anyone else. Sometimes these lessons can be very powerful. These life lessons are here to show us an aspect of ourselves we didn’t realize existed.
I want to end with this great quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer: “If you have the choice of being right or being kind, choose kind.”
Discover the power you have within as you journey on the third road and lavish in a peaceful state.
Rachel Devine is the author of Discover the Power of the Secret within, a book on the power of the subconscious mind and the inner child. The Third Road, a book that gently guides one to the power within and their purpose in life, and Lessons from the Needle in a Haystack, a spiritual book on dating and relationships.
Devine Intervention - The Inner Healing Center website.
Look for my new book on short stories sometime in September 2024!
Please leave your ideas in the comments. Or please also feel free to contact me. I will answer all emails.
Finding Peace Within Yourself - Rachel Devine
Let’s face it, life has its ups and downs and can sometimes go sideways as well. Life is a journey, and each one of us has different highs and lows. No one can predict what tomorrow will bring, but we can stand firm in our inner foundation of peace. Having this solid inner foundation is key to having peace even during the storms of life.
Annie Dillard put it so succinctly when she said:
“No one escapes the wilderness on the way to the promised land.”
That pretty much says it all. No one will ever find peace in their adverse circumstances or world events. However, we can find peace within. Detaching from the adverse circumstances is important. How you view a certain situation determines how much power it has over you. Keeping a steady diet of peaceful techniques is key to building the foundation to withstand the storms of life and own your power.
7 techniques to build a peaceful foundation within:
Let’s face it, life has its ups and downs and can sometimes go sideways as well. Life is a journey, and each one of us has different highs and lows. No one can predict what tomorrow will bring, but we can stand firm on our inner foundation of peace. Having this solid inner foundation is key to having peace even during the storms of life.
Annie Dillard put it so succinctly when she said:
“No one escapes the wilderness on the way to the promised land.”
That pretty much says it all. No one will ever find peace in their adverse circumstances or world events. However, we can find peace within. Detaching from the adverse circumstances is important. How you view a certain situation determines how much power it has over you. Keeping a steady diet of peaceful techniques is key to building the foundation to withstand the storms of life and own your power. These peaceful techniques can transform your life!
Inner Peace Examples.
Inner Peace Examples:
Practice mindfulness and present-moment awareness. Turbulent times often come from dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Mindfulness teaches you to stay grounded in the present moment, observing your thoughts and feelings without judging them. You are safe if you stay focused on the moment. This can help you bypass the mental loops that cause stress.
Cultivate gratitude: Make a conscious effort to appreciate the good things in your life, no matter how small. Gratitude shifts your focus away from problems and allows you to recognize the positive aspects that already exist. Keep a gratitude journal or take time each day to reflect on what you're grateful for.
Practice acceptance: While you can't control everything that happens, you can control how you respond. Accepting circumstances you cannot change with equanimity can bring a sense of peace. Acceptance equals serenity. Additionally, setting strong boundaries with people that disturb your peace of mind is a big step in finding inner peace. You have a choice to detach with love.
Spend time in nature. Being in natural settings has a calming effect on the mind and body. Go for a walk in the park, sit by a lake, or simply observe the clouds passing by. Nature can provide a sense of interconnectedness and perspective and bring much peace into your world.
Engage in relaxation techniques: Practices like deep breathing, meditation, gentle yoga, or progressive muscle relaxation can calm your mind and release physical tension. Find techniques that resonate with you and make them a regular habit. And light a candle to bring some fragrance and light to the mix.
Nurture your spiritual side: Whether through religion, philosophy, or personal beliefs, connecting with a sense of meaning and purpose larger than yourself can bring comfort and grounding during challenging periods. Connecting to your Higher Power, or as I call Him, God, can bring solace during a crisis and peace during any season of life. Connecting to the Spirit within is important to discovering peace and inner support. Remember, God is peace.
Seek social support: confiding in loved ones, joining a support group, or speaking with a therapist or life coach can help you process difficult emotions and gain new perspectives. Be around people who celebrate you. Feeling understood and not alone in your struggles can be immensely therapeutic.
Practicing all or some of these peaceful examples will help you on your quest for serenity. Remember, finding inner peace is a journey, not a destination. Be patient and compassionate with yourself, and trust that even the most turbulent storms will eventually pass. As the old adage says, “this too shall pass,” and it always does.
Your Inner Spirit:
We all have an extraordinary spirit within that brings us much peace and guidance. Our inner spirit directs us on our journey through life in the form of our intuition. When we listen to this inner whisper, we are usually steered away from dangerous situations or brought to joyful ones. The way to listen to this spirit within is through meditation. Meditation will take you from a turbulent day to a peaceful one. Meditation is a way to connect with your inner spirit. Picture the ripples on a brook; the ripples are the turbulence, but if you go beyond the ripples, you will find a peaceful haven in the water where calm awaits you. Incorporating even 10 minutes a day of meditation will change your life into a more serene way of being. It will give your mind a peaceful retreat from the hurried pace of everyday thoughts.
Meditation is one way to find peace in your life.
In conclusion, remember that life has many hills and valleys we must all travel on. However, the key is getting to a point where, no matter what happens in your life, you have a firm foundation of peace within yourself that withstands any storm that comes your way.
Rachel Devine is the author of her new book, Discover the Power of the Secret Within - Healing your Inner Child to Manifest your Dreams.
6 Ways to Find Your Passion in Life Rachel Devine
What gets you jumping out of bed in the morning? When do you lose all sense of time or distraction? What makes you feel inner joy? Exploring these questions reveals clues about your innate passions and the purposes they point to in life. Uncovering what sets your soul on fire allows you to live on purpose rather than drifting through through life disengaged. This article will help you answer the question, “What is Your Passion in Life?” Let’s look at how to find your passion and purpose.
“The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The meaning of life is to give your gift away,” advised philosopher David Viscott. Your passions contain pointers to the gifts only you can give. Let’s explore what’s your passion?
What gets you jumping out of bed in the morning? When do you lose all sense of time or distraction? What makes you feel inner joy? Exploring these questions reveals clues about your innate passions and the purpose they point to in life. Uncovering what sets your soul on fire allows you to live on purpose rather than drifting through life disengaged. This article will help you answer the question, “What is Your Passion in Life?” Let’s look at how to find your passion and purpose.
“The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The meaning of life is to give your gift away,” advised philosopher David Viscott. Your passions contain pointers to the gifts only you can give. Let’s explore what’s your passion?
Your Interests and Talents
What activities energize you and what skills come naturally? Make a list of your interests, strengths, and talents. Common themes will emerge that reveal core passions. Pay attention to what really makes you feel passionate in life. Also, think about what you love doing. What you love doing is also at the core of your purpose in life.
Trying New Experiences
Step outside your comfort zone to experiment with new hobbies, classes, groups, and adventures related to your passions. Join a cooking course, photography club, or an art class, or perhaps a creative writing workshop. Actively sampling the array of possibilities will help you uncover your passion in life. This is the start to transforming your life with meaning.
Immersing Yourself
Don’t just dabble in potential passions, but fully immerse yourself to see what resonates. Spend a summer volunteering at an animal shelter if you love animals. Study jazz piano if that lights you up. Join an extensive art class. Your most vital passions will emerge and you will feel like you are coming back to a familiar home. This will bring you much happiness.
Reconnecting with Childhood Joy
Think back to what activities deeply engaged you as a child. Was it painting, building treehouses, being around animals, or putting on shows? Revisiting these childhood passions reminds you of who you are at your core. Do a short meditation on what life was like as a child and just let your thoughts focus on your childhood and see what comes up in your thoughts.
Purposeful Planning
Once you’ve identified a primary passion, strategically align your life with it. Make time for immersing yourself in what you love daily. Set big goals around how to contribute your talents to the world. Integrate your passion into career, relationships and lifestyle intentionally. Start up a new business, or volunteer your time, or perhaps you want to become a life coach. Whatever you are passionate about, you can start to make strives to bring to the world. The joy will be in the discovery, as well as the journey.
Benefits of Living Passionately
Greater happiness, fulfillment and life satisfaction
Improved self-esteem and sense of identity
Increased motivation, energy, and resilience
Reduced stress and stronger immunity
Reinvigorated sense of adventure and play
Closer connections and enjoyment of others
Improved work performance and effectiveness
Making a meaningful impact on the world
In Dr. Wayne Dyer’s book, Excuses Begone, Dr. Dyer defined passion as: “A vigorous enthusiasm that you feel deep within you. It propels you in a direction that seems motivated by a force beyond your control. It's the inner excitement of being on the right path, doing what you know you were meant to do.”
As mythologist Joseph Campbell advised, “Follow your bliss and doors will open where there were no doors before.”
When your life aligns with inner passion, you thrive and flourish in wondrous ways. Discovering your passion in life will bring you much happiness and inner peace. Let passion light the path to transform your life to an enrichment beyond your wildest dreams. This guide will help you manifest your dreams into your reality.
Rachel Devine is the author of, The Third Road, a book that gently guides one to the power within and your purpose in life & Lessons from the Needle in a Haystack, a spiritual book on dating and relationships.
What’s my purpose in life quiz.
Please leave your ideas in the comments. I will answer any questions you may have. Please also feel free to contact me.